Don't Come Back To Me
by SweetXSacrifice
Summary: When Pete buys a house, Sam realizes that she wants something much different. She decides to take a chance on what her heart really wants. But when things don't work out as she hopes, it just may prove to be the best thing that could happen. And someone's biggest regret will be another's biggest joy. S/N: Pairing is complicated and there will be a surprise appearance :)
1. Chapter 1

So this is a story that my mind won't let go of. It's been a long time since I have written any fanfiction, but writing this has made me realize how much I miss writing for myself as opposed to forced, educational writing. But I'm not and you all are not here to here me go on and on about my self-imposed hiatus so without further ado, enjoy!

**Don't Come Back For Me**

**Chapter 1**

"Sammy, babe, you are not going to believe what I am about to show you." Pete spoke fast and excitedly. I don't know where we were driving to as he kept insisting that I be blindfolded for this surprise. I would think that he'd know by now how much I really hate surprises. The car came to a stop after what seemed like a twenty minute drive from my house.

"I hope you didn't do something too unbelievable!" a nervous chuckle spilled out of me. For some reason my stomach was just churning.

"Don't worry. We're here, let me get the door open for you." Pete stepped out of the car and opened my door. I took hold of his outstretched hands and let him help me out. Turning me around, I felt his fingers slowly untie the knot. "Ok, take a deep breath and open your eyes..."

The blindfold slipped off and I opened my eyes to a house. It was a small, cute little house. The lawn was well manicured and a sign stuck in the middle with the words 'Sold' tacked vertically on it. Looking from the house to Pete, I try to figure out what the surprise is. Because I know it cannot be what it seems to be. Pete is smiling like some fool who just struck gold, waiting for some kind of reaction from me.

"Well?" his patience runs out and he comes close to stand beside me.

"What's the surprise?" I know what it is, but I really hope that Pete tells me that I am mistaken somehow.

"I bought a house for us! Now we have a place for after the wedding! Isn't it great?" Pete grasped my hand and intertwined our fingers. For what seeemed to be a second time today, I was truly speechless.

A house? What would posses him to buy a house for us completely on his own? The house was something you would see in a magazine. Honestly I would have loved the house if the situation was different. But the fact that he bought a house with no input from me was just completely mind boggling.

"Great? What about my house?" I take a deep breath and try to remain calm. I see the excitement and joy dying from Pete's eyes slowly.

"Your house is much too small for both of us, and it will definitely be too small for any kids and the dog." Pete spoke firmly as though he was making the world's most logical argument. I felt my breathing hitch a little as he mentioned the kids and dogs that we were supposed to be having. The wedding has not even been planned out yet and he's talking about kids.

"My house is fine for two people and there wouldn't be any kids for a while you know that."

"Oh right, because of your super important job. I'm sorry, I don't know how I could have forgotten that!" Pete snaps at me.

"I thought you understood and appreciate what I do at work? We talked about this Pete."

"We did talk about it, but I don't think I'm finished talking about it after all. All you care about is your job and your...team." Pete paused at the last word as though he really wanted to say something else. "And you need to start caring about me the same way if not more than your precious job."

His voice was starting to get louder and louder and looking around I noted how quiet the neighborhood was. As each moment passed and the more I thought about it, the more infuriated I was becoming. Though I am ready to snap, I don't want to cause a scene or give anyone something to talk about. I suck in a deep breath and try to compose myself.

"I am not going to talk about this with you here."

"Why, you don't have time? Need to rush back to work?" Pete spitted out, his voice growing bitter by the moment.

"Because I refuse to cause a scene like this."

"Fine." Pete stormed back to the car and jumped in. The ride back to the house was quiet and tense. I can't believe how Pete is trying to turn this around on me. My job is very demanding and he knows how guilty I feel about not being able to be home a lot. But that doesn't give him the right to do as he pleases, especially with things that effect us equally. Am I really wrong for not being happy that he made such a big decision without me? I know that Pete means well, I really do but that doesn't mean he should always be making decisions for me. This isn't the first time he's done this type of thing either. I've had enough controlling relationships to last a lifetime.

Back in the solace of my own home, I grab a drink before heading into round two of our talk. "You know Pete, you knew what kind of woman I was before you proposed. And most people cannot say that they know me the way you do."

"You're right. And I would even say I know you more than you are willing to admit that you know yourself." Pete, cool and collected once again, spoke with such an air of confidence.

"I really doubt that. What you said back at your house..."

"Our house." Pete interrupted.

"No, at your house, this is my house. I don't care about my team more than you or my job. What I care about is the fact that we are in a relationship, we are engaged, and you went and made a huge decision for us without respect of my feelings."

"I did this for us Sam. For the past month it has seemed that you have been in some sort of fog, like you weren't really happy. I thought this house would put everything in perspective for you and show you how things can be if you will just allow it to happen." Pete spoke passionately. His words being soft and gently, almost willing me to accept them. But I just couldn't, the word perspective, just hit me like a ton of bricks.

"You know what? You're right. This house did put everything in perspective for me. I think I was expecting too much from you and hoping you would be something that you aren't. I'm sorry, but I don't need someone who won't value my opinion or respect my feelings. Do you understand that? I mean, a marriage is made up of two people not just one." I bite my tongue, not wanting to be too harsh even though I can still feel my blood boiling. I don't know how I didn't see how controlling Pete could be. His persistence in finding out what I do should have given me some kind of clue, but I brushed it aside and explained it away by him being a cop. I think deep down I always knew how Pete really was but I was so desperate for a normal life, for someone to come home to, that I was blinded by everything else.

"So what is it that you are saying Sam? I know I may have been too excited and moved too quickly but that's only because I love you."

"I know you love me. I really do. It's just that I don't think this is what I want anymore. I think I was forcing myself to believe this could work but I have to be honest. You deserve that much and more than I could ever offer you." I take a deep breath and try and gauge his reaction. His face falls like the wind just got taken out of him. My heart burns a little and I can't help but feel like I am the worst person in the world.

Seconds turn into minutes and he has yet to break the awkward silence. I see him taking deep gulps and trying to process everything. His hands turn into fists and his anger is visibly rising. His mouth opens and closes, opens and closes. Pete has never been one to really explode but I wouldn't be surprised if he did so now, it would be warranted after all.

"I wish you didn't feel that way but uh...I...I'll just see you later. I need to go for a drive or something." Pete mumbled along and turned to walk out the house.

**A/N: There you go, hope you all like it. Review Please! :) **


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Hey everyone! Thanks for reading/reviewing/following! Glad you guys like it so far. **

**Chapter 2**

The door, along with that part of my life, slammed shut. I sit in the nearby chair in my living room and take a swig of my drink, wishing it was something much stronger. Oddly enough it seems like what just happened was done in an automatic way, as though I was on auto-pilot or watching what happened outside of my body. Yet I know that it was the right thing to do, and I don't regret it. Better now rather than to go through with the wedding. That would be even worse. As safe as Pete was, safe wasn't going to make me happy. Simply content and as much as I've seen and been through, I need to be more than content for once. I know what I want and I know what I need to do. But despite me being this tough soldier that I have always aimed at projecting, I'm scared...no I'm terrified to take the next step in the right direction.

What if all my feelings were wrong or unrequited? What if I end up making the biggest mistake of my life? Because in all actuality, that is what it would amount to. The biggest mistake of my life. If I am wrong, then not only will my personal life suffer for it, but so to will my professional life. Talk about a calculated risk, that's what this was for sure. Although I can't help be nervous, I am fairly confident that my feelings are a two way street. If I have to make the first move, then so be it. There has been plenty of signs in the past that I'm not the only one willing to give something new and different a try. Because everything else has been a dead end for the both of us.

Placing my glass on the tap, the light reflects off of the engagement ring that Pete gave me. I can't help but wince as I see that an hour has barely passed since he left. I haven't even removed the ring that was supposed to mean so much to me and yet here I was thinking about someone else. To an outsider I would look like some kind of conniving and selfish woman. And maybe that's true to a certain extent. People will always judge me, they have with every other choice that I've ever made, but they don't know my heart. And in my heart I know I would never do something with malice or cruel intentions to Pete or anyone else.

I close my eyes and lean back into my chair. Looking at the clock, I'm relieved that tomorrow is a down day. One that I will actually stay home for for once. Tomorrow I will take the first step to happiness. Sighing deeply, I start to let my mind drift. The moment I do the phone chooses to make it's shrill and demanding sound. It could only be less than a handful of people, and in my line of work I can't really afford to miss any calls purposefully. It rings a few more times before I grab the phone from it's cradle.

"Hello."

"Hey Carter, want to come back to work early?" Colonel O'Neill speas carefree and somewhat jovial. Biting back a sigh of frustration I readily supply a response.

"Of course, always ready to serve. Home grown incident or outsourced incident?" I ask, attempting to mask me outright asking if the issue involves going off world or not. Never know who could be listening.

"You know how these things go Carter, while mommy is awhile the kids will play and make a mess of things." Colonel seemed to be taking too much pleasure from this.

"Right, I guess that's better than the alternative. Technically. Be there in ten sir." I responded before hanging up.

Oh yeah, I'm definitely glad tomorrow is a down day.

As I go past the security checkpoints on base, I notice that most of the personnel is elsewhere. Glancing at my watch, I didn't realize how much time had passed. It was two hours from midnight, and here I am back where I started my day. I love this place but yet I hate it at the same time.

A passing airman salutes me and says hello. I return it quickly as I enter into the elevator to go down to where the labs are. The elevator doors slide open and what I see is slowly turning into organized chaos. Steam is flowing out from one of the rooms and a guard is standing by with some sort of oversized water hose. Of course one of the technicians blew something up, they never seem to be able to do anything else quite as well as that.

Turning the corner Felger is the first to see me. Rushing up to my side he is quick to try and pacify the situation. "Major Carter, this is not what it looks like."

"So you're telling me one of you didn't blow up something in the lab and that fire over there is not really burning?"

"Ok, so it's exactly what it looks like, but it was an accident." Felger stumbled over his words.

"It always is Felger. Lets hurry up and clean up this mess." I pat Felger and begin to access the damage.

After about two hours of clean up and damage control, the lab is back in order and everything locked away to where it's supposed to be. I ended sending everyone home except for Felger at the end. Too many helping hands ended up slowing things down even further. Felger took in a deep breath and sighed, wiping his hands together.

"Well, that wasn't so bad."

"I guess. Let's just call it a day shall we?" I can't help but mentally add that I already had called it a day about six hours ago.

"Right. Goodnight Major Carter." Felger grabbed his things and left the lab and I followed suit.

Arriving back home, I immediately head up stairs, jump in the shower and crash in bed. Tomorrow is going to be a big day and I need to be fully rested for it.

Waking up, I stretch and glance at the clock on my bed. _10:04a. _Slept longer than my usual time, but I still feel restless and am beginning to feel more anxious by the minute. Maybe that's a sign that I shouldn't do anything. Maybe I'm making too big of an assumption in how much my feelings may be reciprocated.

Today is my day off, I don't need to spend it stressing myself out needlessly. I just need to calm down and relax. I'll just stay home and watch a movie or read a book that I haven't been able to get to. There will always be another day to let my feelings be known.

With my mind made up, I scoot off the bed and get dressed to go downstairs to eat. Looking in my fridge, I can almost imagine a dust ball rolling around in it as it's practically empty. Taking a deep sigh, I realize if I want to eat at all today, I will have to go grocery shopping and restock. Grabbing my purse and keys, I jump into my car and make my way to the local grocery store.

Once in the supermarket, I grab a cart and begin to make my way down the aisles. I randomly grab things I think I will want later. I go up and down each aisle and am about to turn onto the ice cream aisle. I quickly come to a halt as I see none other than Colonel O'Neill walking slowly and pausing at one of the freezers.

My mind goes back to earlier this morning when I had talked myself out of confessing my true feelings. Is this another sign? A true sign this time? Look at me, I'm a Major in a highly classified military operation whofights aliens and I can't even bring myself to open myself up. And the pain I know I caused Pete should at least have a reason behind it. And it does. So that reason must be followed up with.

Taking a deep breath, I hurry up past the lane to avoid Colonel O'Neill. I will put an end to all these years of confusion and standstill one way or another.

"Paper or plastic ma'am?" The cashier snaps me back to reality.

"Paper is fine, thanks."

Finishing up with the last of my gorcerires, I pay for everything and push my cart to my car. The earlier feelings of anxiety are slowly creeping up on me. I just want to go and tell him my feelings as soon as possible. It takes everything inside of me to drive in the direction of my house instead.

**A/N: So I was going to keep going, but I feel like I am moving too fast. Hope you guys liked it. If not feel free to criticise away! I'm trying to update at least once a week, so hopefully I'll have another chapter up by next sunday but if not, well quality is better than quantity right? :) **


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

Utilizing all of my inner strength and willpower, I pull into Colonel O'Neill's driveway. I can't believe this is happening, I can't believe that I'm finally doing what I only dreamed about. Now if only the rest of that dream comes true. Regardless of the outcome at least, I can feel a sense of closure whether it be good or bad. But hopefully its a good closure. And why wouldn't it be? I know this is what we both really want. More importantly what we both really need. I take a few more gulps and even more deep breaths and reach for my car door handle.

Walking up to the front door, I hear the sound of something clanking on the ground. The Colonel must be outside. I pause before I make a step into the backyard. This is a conversation for Jack, not Colonel O'Neill. I have to show him how serious and how committed I am to the idea of something more. With each passing moment, I feel my confidence growing stronger. Reaching the gate that separates Jack's backyard from the front, I push it open. I see him standing at the grill about to turn around. I clear my throat in attempt to get him to face me, once he does I see his face don a look of surprise.

"Carter? What's going on, everything with the SGC ok?" he asked while placing his beer down almost mentally preparing for bad news.

"No everything is fine, sir. I was uh, just driving by and figured I see what you were up to." I slightly cringe at my own lame response. And Jack did not seem to buy it one bit.

"That's funny, cause the store or anywhere you may need to go most likely is closer to your house so out with it Carter. Gimme the real reason." A slight smirk laid on his face.

Well here is the moment of truth.

"You're right sir. There's um, something I wanted to tell you," I took a deep breath and was just about to continue when the sliding doors to Jack's house slowly began to open. I watched as time began to move in slow motion. Exiting the house was Kerry, the SGC-CIA liaison who had been back and forth between Colorado and D.C. over the last two months. She was smiling widely and pleasantly as she put down a bowl of salad on the picnic table before waving to me.

I force myself to wave back as I feel as though I have been smacked in the face repeatedly. Jack was a private man, not one to have people over casually. So I knew this was not some harmless gathering. How long had this been going on? Was it serious? I look between the two briefly before deciding that I have to follow through with this regardless. Jack was waiting for me to finish my sentence still.

"Actually, I need to tell you something. I didn't realize you had company but can I speak with you...privately for a moment?" I tell myself to just keep breathing and take baby steps.

After what seems like a lifetime of contemplating, Jack turns to Kerry, "You mind? We should only be a minute."

Kerry smiles again, and agrees. For some reason her super sweet exterior makes me feel nauseous. Did Jack feel like that about Pete? Did he hate Pete as much as I dislike Kerry right now? Internally shaking such irrational thoughts out my mind, I follow Jack as he gestures to his house. Once inside he motions again for me to start.

"So?"

"Pete bought a house for us today." That's a good solid start.

"Oh, congratulations, that's really great!" A genuine yet small smile graced his face. I like to think I can read his expressions fairly well by now but with that smile, I'm hoping I'm mistaken.

"Well I don't know if a congrats is in order. When he showed me the house it was supposed to be this great surprise, this grand gesture but it just made me realize that this isn't working out nothing is." I pause and try to gauge his reaction. I can tell he is confuse and didn't really get what I'm trying to say.

"Why wasn't it working out Carter?"

"Because...Jack, it wasn't you." I take another sigh for probably the millionth time today, relieved to have finally gotten that out.

Jack was shell shocked. He took on the appearance of a fish as his mouth opened and closed repeatedly trying to speak.

"You do know tat Kerry is not just a friend right?" his words came out slow and uncertain. Perhaps he was trying to keep his hopes low but he didn't have to. Not anymore.

"I do. But I also know that if I go one more day without telling you this that we will both regret it. I called off my engagement to Pete because he couldn't make me feel anywhere close to how I feel when I am with you. I know you're with Kerry and honestly I don't meant to disrespect or hurt her, I didn't even know about you two. But what I do know, is that after all the years we've known each other, put our lives on the line for each other, is that I love you. I don't care about the regulations anymore, I really don't. All I care about is you." My voice hitches at the end as my confession finally rolls off my tongue.

**A/N: Please read and review :) Next chapter is going to be crazy! Stay tuned!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Author Note**

**So a guest reviewed mentioning an important thing I should have explained from the start. This story is AU in that it doesn't follow the exact time lines from the show. I know Jack is a General and Sam is a Lt. Colonel when she's dating Pete in the show, but for the sake of my storyline, Jack is still a Colonel on Sg-1 and Sam is still a Major. So in future chapters, if certain things happen that seems weird, that's why. **

**I'm working on Chapter 4 now, so it should be up within the week. :)**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Warning...this chapter will be a "little" out of character. The word little can really be a subjective word don't you think? Lol **

**Chapter 4**

I feel like a weight has been lifted off of my shoulders and after all these years of supressing my feelings I can finally breath again. Just that confession alone was such a heavy burden to me for countless years that whatever happens next, even if it is the worst case scenario, could never compare. And as the words rolled off my tongue, I realized that I believed them with every fiber of my being, though that speech was nothing similar to the one I had prepared earlier. I would do whatever it takes to be with Jack now. Consequences be damned.

By now, Jack had taken a seat. His head was lowered with his hands propping him up. His eyes were shifting back and forth as though he was still processing everything. I know this was a lot to unload on him, especially unexpectedly like this, but honestly I was expecting a much quicker response.

"I, uh. Don't really know what to say." Jack finally spoke, uncertain just like before. It seemed like he was treading on glass, choosing his words carefully.

"What? The infamous Jack O'Neill is speechless?" I try to lighten the mood with a joke, but it is met with an unappreciative, slight glare. "Just say what you honestly feel."

"You've been with Pete for awhile now, even got engaged to him. Why now, what's changed?" Jack stared me straight in my eyes.

"I was trying to be satisfied with what I though was the only chance at having a life. I was content with him, but Pete never really made me happy. I made a huge mistake, I know that now. And I know that you and I feel the same way." I muster up as much conviction and urgency as I can as I can see Jack isn't going to be so forthcoming with his feelings. To be honest, he never has so I shouldn't expect this time to be any different. But I hoped he would be anxious to reveal his true feelings just like I was.

"I won't sit here and deny the fact that there were feelings in the past. But nothing has changed, the regulations still exist Carter."

There was that word. He called me Carter. Carter. When I had so clearly and readily been using first name basis with him in attempt to communicate the level I was trying to be on. The level that we desperately should be on. That one word that told me everything that I needed to know. Yet I still needed absolute confirmation and resolution. I refuse to walk away based off of possibilities still looming on the horizon. My resolve, still present though wavering, must stay strong. I must push on until I know all hope is gone for sure and that I did everything I can do.

"And as I said before, I don't care about that anymore. I'm willing to do whatever it takes in order to give us a chance." I could see that Jack was struggling with this, much more so than I had thought he would. But maybe he just had to be pushed a little bit. Maybe all is not lost as I was beginning to tragically imagine.

Jack ran his hand over his face and let out a deep sigh. Whatever was going to be said next, I could tell was going to be the deciding factor of our fate. I could feel my breathing start to slightly hitch and my nerves grew stronger by the second.

"Look Carter. I know it took a lot for you to come here and tell me how you really felt. And I appreciate all your honesty. But, it still doesn't change the fact that you gave up and moved on with Pete. I'm with Kerry now, and I think we go well together. We make sense."

They make sense? How can he even begin to say that? I'm supposed to be the one that he makes sense with. I'm supposed to be the one that complements and goes well with him. That is supposed to be us. I can't be too late. I just can't.

"What do you mean? Our feelings were real and strong. How can you stand here and say that is all apart of the past?

"I'm sorry, but I moved on too," his words were gentle yet definite as though there was no room for further debate. "Maybe..."

He paused. There is no longer any more time to hold back words now. Not for my sake. The damage had already been done. And this felt like just the beginning of the end.

"Just say it. Be honest."

"Maybe, we we never meant to be. I mean, maybe the attraction was just because it was forbidden but I'm happy with Kerry."

"You said you and Kerry make sense. Well so did Pete and I but that didn't mean we were happy. But uh..." My eyes involuntarily shoot up and I try to keep the tears at bay as I find it difficult to finish my sentence. I already made a fool of myself in front of him, I can't let him see me crying. Choking down air, I feel as though I'm suffocating. I don't know how I could have possibly not have seen this coming.

"I uh. I guess I'll have to accept that. I should just go now, I'll...see you on base." I spit out as fast as possible and make a beeline for the door. My feet cannot carry me to my car fast enough. I don't even take a second look or wait for a reply as I pass by Jack.

Practically flying out the doors, I am grateful that Kerry wasn't anywhere to be found. Reaching my car, I jump inside and almost frantically begin driving home. I can feel my breathing coming and going erratically. I try to concentrate on evening it out not wanting to hyperventilate, at least not before I get home.

Not even half way there and my composure that I've managed to keep has broken away like a dam and with it comes all the tears. I feel like the world's biggest fool. How stupid I was to believe that he would take me now. Did I really think I was that special, that I was worth so much that Jack would just up and leave Kerry for me?

Somehow I arrived home in one peace. I was frozen in the driver seat. My thoughts left me paralyzed. I don't know how I can ever face him again. I feel shattered and as though my world came crashing down in one swift move.

And to think I honestly believed I could handle being rejected just a few hours earlier. I was so damn arrogant to think that this wasn't a plausible outcome. And now here I sit, completely alone. The only solace, small as it is, is that Pete will be able to move on to someone who really deserves him.

Because I clearly did not. I will just have to accept this hand that life has dealt, accept my fate. At least I still have an amazing career. At least I have amazing friends.

Thinking about my friends, a thought crosses my mind that I didn't even think about before. Would Jack and I still be friends? Or did I blow that too? Maybe a better question to ask myself if being honest is could I still be friends with him?

My heart feels like its on fire. For the first time in my life, I'm not sure I can handle this crushing blow. Things will never be the same with us. Maybe in time it will get better, though I don't see how. But I know that we will never return to what use to be.

And it's all my fault. I'm a brilliant scientist. I can fix practically any and everything yet I can't manage to fix myself. I damage everything that has ever been truly important to me. And I don't know where to even begin to change any of this. Maybe I am really broken in all the ways that really count.

I see my neighbor turning their light on and the door slightly opened. I guess they were wondering why I was staying outside so long. As if they really cared. But I guess I better go inside and stop being everyone's entertainment for tonight.

God knows I have had enough entertainment to last a lifetime.

**A/N: Whew. That chapter was angsty! But not as angsty as future chapters will be. The rest of SG-1 and other important SGC members will be making their debut in the next chapter! :) Please read and review. **


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